For the second My Madam Monday blog post, I wanted to share a quick opinion on BDSM and Therapy. This is My opinion and Me generously sharing My thoughts and philosophy. I am not licensed, nor do I have any recognized credentials.
As a reminder, My Madam Monday is an opportunity for us to connect. I tell you, dear reader, a little bit about Me- thoughts and experiences in poly and BDSM. In return, you complete a small task for Me. It is a new concept, so bear with Me as we work out the kinks!
It is My belief that EVERYONE benefits from self-awareness and constant personal improvement. The human mind and WHY we behave the way we do is a fascinating study and one I've enjoyed for a very long time. I find that I empathize with others and enjoy lending an ear or an objective point of view from time to time. Some people find My opinion and experiences valuable or helpful. That is a rewarding feeling for Me and I am happy to coach and counsel by request.
That said, I do not hold any degrees or certifications in any kind of psychotherapy, physical therapy, or any other therapy. I believe in its value and encourage everyone to find a good therapist with the proper credentials. It can be scary to find a therapist, to be open and honest about desires, thoughts, feelings. Guilt and shame are real! Finding a professional you are comfortable sharing with (and can afford) can be really distressing. Please do not let those things stop you from seeking help if you need it! It is well worth it, I promise!
"BDSM is not therapy." That is a common sentence heard in BDSM circles. And technically, it isn't. It is an escape, a deep experience, and an endorphin rush. For some people, it is living out a fantasy or connecting with their true selves. Others find lasting connections or make personal breakthroughs with sexual inhibitions. Still others find a catharsis through crying or pain. In all cases, I believe people find freedom and acceptance in BDSM that the "real" world doesn't provide.
And those things can be, for some people, truly therapeutic.
In that sense, BDSM IS therapy much like art or music can be a form of therapy. It is an opportunity to express ourselves, to release negative energy, and to rejuvenate. After a BDSM session, many people feel a sense of peace and relief, contentment and security. There are many who use BDSM precisely as this type of outlet and that's great if it is a positive force in your life! Just remember that there are no certificates or degrees for BDSM and it does not replace real self-work with a trained and licensed therapist!
The Task 2.21.22
Self-work and mindfulness are so incredibly sexy to Me. I've done quite a bit of it Myself and continue to do so. People who continue to educate and work on themselves really make My panties wet. The best slaves and submissives are the ones who can take care of themselves, who know their own value and worth, and who actively work to be better people in their families, communities, careers.
Get busy learning yourself. Recognize the mistakes and learn from them. Change the bad habit behaviors. Do the thing you keep saying you will do.
Do ONE THING today better than you did yesterday.