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Madam Jess

Know Your Place

Updated: Jul 11, 2022

I went to a Munch last week. First time in a while, but I figured it would be good to show My face to the community that brought Me up in the Lifestyle. At least say hello and remind them I'm still around. Besides, the last time I went, a guy showed up at the Munch (his first one ever) just to meet Me.


I gave him a card of course.


I've been to this Munch a couple of times and know a few of the folks there, some for more than ten years. They have their quirks like any other group of Kinksters. And they sort of have a look to them... if you know what you are looking for anyway. I mean, the Community is what it is. I can't make any excuses for it so I won't try. But the Munch location is close to home and the drinks are pretty good so I stopped in.


As I walked in and joined the Munch I'm greeted with some gestures of recognition. A few hugs and hellos on my way to a table before I'm ushered into a seat. It feels a bit like an episode of Cheers and yes I'm old enough to remember that.


It doesn't take long for the "joke" that I know is coming. Within moments I'm hit with the "glad you could come down from there and join us commoners here at the bottom" jibe that I always sort of expect. And there's some validity to it- I don't traverse the Community like I used to in the Before Times. Even less since going Pro.


So I smile and play along. Everyone always has questions, either about My travels or My shoots or whatever. I "hold court" as they call it while folks come and go as they get the nerve to come chat with Me. Occasionally, I have a moment to Myself to look around at the group of folks I'm sharing space with, to really observe them. It sinks in how different these people are from the clients I interact with now and the other Pros I've met.


I remember the first real life Professional Dominatrix I ever met as a Lifestyle newbie. She was severe and menacing and beautiful in leather and corset and boots. She was the only one I ever remember coming out to Lifestyle Community events, amongst the "commoners". There was always a presence about Her, a real aura of power. It wasn't unfriendly or unapproachable, but it certainly set Her apart from everyone else with a sort of elevated distance. She belonged up There and I, when I met her, was somewhere over here.


They were all like that to Me in the beginning- the ProDoms, the Producers, the Models.... The industry people on the upper edges of the Community ruling the internet with their Content before anyone called in that. They had a place and I had Mine. They were a different breed, untouchable with their self-confident attitudes and elusive real-life appearances.


The general noise of the Munch shifted. One of the older Community Members near Me started telling a story about another woman who had risen from the ranks to join the Elite, complaining about how the woman changed after going Pro. But then she stopped short and muttered to herself, "well, I guess THEY have their place" without quite making eye contact with Me.


I'm officially on the other side now. I've crossed over. I've joined the ones "over there," the ones looked at in both awe and contempt by those they left behind.


We do have a place. I have a place. The work has its place.


Know your Place. *Hint*- It's closer to the ground.


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